Dungeon Monitors: House Safety at Play Parties

At BDSM parties and public playspaces, a Dungeon Monitor (DM) is the person charged with keeping order and safety on the floor. They are not just walkers; when they are on duty their authority is absolute. Their main job is the physical safety of everyone playing and making sure house rules get followed. DMs usually have deep BDSM experience or clear training for the role, and many also have verifiable safety training and first-aid skills. If a DM tells a scene to stop, it stops at once.

They often mark themselves with a uniform, hat, or armband so people can spot them quickly, though there is no single standard outfit. The work is usually layered: a team of DMs under one or more Chief Dungeon Monitors. At a private gathering the host may act as Chief DM, name a guest to help, and add more DMs. At a public venue the house typically assigns volunteers or staff.

Almost every playspace posts house rules — banned activities, a default safeword, sometimes a safe gesture. Between scenes DMs also keep the gear usable: push players to wipe surfaces and toys with disinfectant, swap pads, and leave the area ready for the next scene. All of this assumes adults who have already negotiated what they are doing.